No news is good news?

Have no further movement on the op front - hey ho.

Have had a pretty poor week, and am finding increasingly that the addition of morphine to my regime is very detrimental to my memory, concentration and composure! I get very confused very easily, especially if a few things are going on at the same time. I forget things and things I have been told (allegedly!). But it does seem to help the pain, so there we go.

Cirrus did have an abscess by the way!

Alfie is fabulous. Ellie is cool, and Murphy is great! We are taking them to another dog show tomorrow so hopefully they will be on form.

In some ways its hard to have a blog, as every day is so mind numbingly the same, tedious and painful its hard to document it. I'm struggling to be upbeat and not to get into a depression though I'm pretty darn good at not thinking about negative things! At least I have a structure to the day so I don't stay in bed. I'm really existing in a limbo until the operation. I know it may not work, or may take a long time to find the right stimulation parameters to work, but I have to be hopeful. However every other procedure has been a failure eventually and I have coped, and the drugs have always been pretty useless as well, so the last 7 years have taught me how to deal with disapointment I guess. But I still have hope, and while I have that, I will fight.

Anyway, just found a film about MSC on line - here:

http://www.medicalvideos.us/videos-941-Motor-cortex-stimulation-for-Chronic-pain

Niki x

Nearer a surgery date..

Well apparently I'm in the place on the list which should be done before end of August, BUT, they are running a month behind - which means I *should* be done before end of September.

So movement of a kind. Oh and the notice could be a day! Like, come in tomorrow. Yikes.

Bit spooked about it today to be honest - mainly the MRI again! The tests will all be done in the hospital the day before the op, so no trekking up and down to and back from Cardiff.

Morphine and fentanyl combo is ok, better than singley. Pain is not great, at a level where its hard to do more than the basics, plus the drugs make me somewhat apathetic. Added to that Cirrus had a mystery lameness recently so he's not been right to ride. I AM bringing them in tomorrow to trot him up on a hard surface and check, plus trim his feet. And dectomax him. And cuddle him.

Got a Seth Lakeman gig on Friday, and even better, my friend Helen (Helen from Evesham not Windsor) is coming as well! Very much looking forward to seeing her again.

Alfie is doing really well - he's huuuuuuge now - and very clever. I've mislaid the lead that connects my phone to the PC, actually, make that not sure where the lead is and can't be bothered to look as yet.... so no pictures as yet.

Ben took some fantastic pictures of Cirrus - looking very good for once, other than his sore face - but one is particularly good - here it is!



Niki x